Grace First: A Woman’s Path Through Perimenopause

Grace First: A Woman’s Path Through Perimenopause

Highlights and Introduction

“Why am I so angry with my partner?”, “Why am I shouting at the kids?” , “Why can’t I, volunteer for this thing like other moms can?” And I think grace is really important in those moments, just to be able to say, “You know what? , Under these circumstances, I’m doing really well. I’m still there for my kids. I’m not the shiniest person ever, but, , it’s understandable that we can’t hold it all.”
And being able to, extend grace to ourselves is probably the greatest gift we could give ourselves and those around us.
How would I relate to this if I actually knew that I was enough? If I knew that I was- Oh … totally enough, and I was also tired, and I didn’t have to prove that I’m hardworking or present or a good mom or a good partner, I just, I’m enough and I’m tired.
these incredible leaders who I would love to be Are receiving awards because they are constantly available and do a lot of things, and I struggle with it. ‘Cause there was not a single person up there who was verbally congratulated for their boundaries- or for doing less, but being present when they are. It might be affirmed back to them in some ways, but I, I had a moment where I just, I struggled. ‘
Welcome to the Peri Moon Podcast, and today I am joined by my beautiful friend Sheridan Ruth. Sheridan is a nervous system specialist, and I was so, so blessed to have her as a guest coach in the Peri Moon app when it was– we were in the thick of that. Um, Sheridan, thank you so much for being here today Thank you for having me.

Practical Nervous System Regulation for Busy Women

How can you regulate your nervous system when you only have a few minutes?

I was really s- I’ve been really selective over the past year or so about how I spend my time as it relates to work, and I was really excited when you reached out because one of the things that I’ve been being really mindful to do less of is just be in spaces where we’re looking for what I feel or would, like, call as kind of something superficial.
Or, um, fixed energy, just like being in that space where you’re like, I, like, I don’t know, there’s like a lacking of depth. Especially I think lately over, I think we’ve all felt this, like the whole AI, social media, marketing, like everything is an ad. I don’t know. Um, so it was exciting when you reached out about the podcast because I knew that, yes, this would be a space where I could just kind of talk without having to bottle myself into a certain…
Without having to, like, reframe it or, like, work my language into a, a box of some sort. So listeners, I’m really excited that you’re here because I think, I’m hoping and I f- feel confident that we’re gonna be able to speak about things that we might be thinking really deep down inside, but maybe not saying or we don’t have words for.
Um, and so I’m really happy that we’re all on this journey together. Aw. I, thank you, and that’s absolutely the intention of this podcast is for, like, I have, I’ve got deep, deep in all of my marketing material. It’s like, it’s, that is my modus operandi, that is my absolute guiding light, is for things to be deep.
Because I just, I don’t, I feel the same. I feel like you hop on Instagram and things are like a 10-second s- you know, s- a little snap, a snippet of something that should be a three-hour conversation, and I feel like AI’s just diluting everything down to, “This is the top 10 tips you need.” Um, so I’m so grateful to have you here, and to have you here with that intention as well is just so profound for me, and I’m so, so, so grateful to have you here and for us to explore all of the crevices and whatever comes up without any, any need to, like, feel like we have an agenda.
So thank you. Yeah. Thank you. We’re, yeah, thank you. Aw. Um, I, so you were a guest coach in, when the Peri Moon app was in the thick of it, when I was- Very much operating from a f- a s- a kind of dysregulation. I think I needed something to occupy me at that time, um, something big, immediate, as I was going through divorce, and it was a beautiful alchemical experience, but I won’t say it was the most regulating experience.
It was kind of a beast. And the feedback I got from other women especially, and I’ve experienced it myself, was what you do with the nervous system is so practical and tangible, and I think a lot of the time women feel very much like, “I have so much str-…” Like, we just compound our stress upon stress upon stress, work stress, home stress, family stress, relationship stress, every stress, and we compound it, and then it becomes a huge monster That we can’t even comprehend being able to tackle.
And I feel like a lot of women actually shy away from any form of nervous system work or self-care because they just feel like it’s too big to even begin with. And, and that’s what I loved about your work is it’s not an instant fix, but even being able to s- shift the physiology for just a second can really change the way we think about things, um, and help us to be able to, you know, settle a little bit more into the present.
And I’m so grateful that you gave me that experience, and my, the women of, you know, that were in the app had that experience. And, um, yeah, thank you so much for that. Yeah. Thank you. I, I like hearing that because as much as I hate quick fixes, like, we have to have, like, an anchor or a place to halt, hold onto something, right?
And I think, like, even this morning as I was getting ready, I had something come up that I need to do today later on, and it kind of thr- and I had a couple of things, and it kind of, it honestly threw me into a dysregulated state ’cause, you know, in my mind I was like, “This is my day. This is my Sunday.” Like, this is the one day a week where I do not have to show up for anyone else, and I just do what I want.
And I got thrown by it, and I really needed in that moment something to kind of br- circuit break my own thoughts that are just like … ‘Cause I was like, okay, I had this thought. I was like, “Maybe I should meditate.” And then I was like, oh, my God, I would have to medi- like, I, just like … And I was like, oh, now I’m gonna ha- Then my thoughts went to, I’m gonna have to completely redo my entire life.
Like, now I should have, like, a different systems. And then I was like, no, Sheridan, you’ve been in that one too. You don’t need to, like, create a system right now. You actually just need to experience calm in this moment. So went back to the thought, oh, I should regulate. And then, I mean, I should meditate.
And I was … And that felt so big. And what I ended up doing was just asking, it’s just so simple, which is this question of what is the story that my body is telling, and then what is objectively true? And in my book we talk about these nervous system stories, and the story that my body was telling was like, I don’t have a…
I was, like, very, I would say not super activated, like, what I would call the yellow zone, which is, like, a fight/flight situation, but, like, slightly activated of, like, I don’t have enough time. There are so many things to do. I’ve gotta write a list. Like, you know, that little frantic place that I was in that place yesterday in a really good way ’cause I was having a busy day and I was alive, and it was just like, oh, my God, there was such, such great things happening.
And I was … It was, like, an alive state. And, um, I was running around the house so excited, picking this thing up, packing my bag. Um, but in that moment I was in that state of, like, I don’t have enough time. There’s not enough time. There are so many things to do. Oh, my God, I always have to do things for everyone.
When do I get to sit down for myself? Um- And I just took that story and then I looked at it, like in my mind I looked at it, and I was like I can’t remember the question I asked, but in the book we talk about, um, just like what would another story be from a place of regulation? And there is, we give some examples of what those stories would be.
Um, number one, it never has urgency, and number two, there’s never like pr- real- a lot of pressure around it. Um, last night I did the same thing, and the question I asked myself was like, “How would I feel about this if I knew I had all the time in the world?” Helps me kind of get out of that. And then I was like, “Okay, cool. I do have to do all of these things. These are all things that need to be done today, but I get to choose how they’re done, when they’re done, and in which order they are done, and how I feel as I go about them, and how complicated I make either of them.”
I have to make some food. I don’t need to make it into this whole… Like, I have agency in that. And even that’s not like a traditional, traditional, like, it’s not like an Instagram-worthy way of talking about regulation, but what I did in that moment was I just reminded my body that I have agency, which makes me feel more regulated because this equation that my body is doing is how big am I in contrast to my problems.

The Power of Story in Healing and Self-Regulation

Why do the stories we tell ourselves shape our emotional wellbeing?

Um, so yes, they’re not… They need to be deep and they need to be nuanced, but they’ve also gotta be really practical when I have six minutes- Mm … before I need to take a phone call, and get someone out the door, and do this other thing, and I don’t wanna do it from a place of overwhelm. I l- I love that, and I’ve been…
Yeah, I do- I just feel like the power of story is so transcendent, and its capacity to take us out of experiences that we feel like we have no agency, that we feel, you know, y- almost a victimhood in. And we can take ourselves out of that and become the hero in any moment, you know? And it’s, and it’s- Mm
this, this story that makes us … Y- it, it … We’re only as strong as the story we tell ourselves really. And, and once we ask ourself th- those types of questions is, like, what do I have power over here? And what can I move? And what would feel good to me? And what would be easy in this moment? When we start to ask ourselves that, we, we can begin to grow as a, you know, the character in, in our own story really.
Yeah. And I think it’s really interesting as well, like when we look at it even from the perimenopause side of things, which I found myself doing a lot with Peri Moon. And as … Like, the more that I’ve learned about h- how the nervous system works, and, like, you know, your body’s taking in all of this information.
It takes it up through your senses to, through the ascen- ascending retic- reticular activating system. And then that activates your prefrontal, which is like the limbic system. Then a- that activates your prefrontal cortex. Your prefrontal cortex basically creates a story to help understand all of the sensation that’s happening in your body.
And so it happens after, and it’s shaped by our past experiences, and, like, all of these beliefs and ex- and memories that we have, and what other people have told us makes sense. And it’s, it’s just so interesting how we can have the same physiological experience and have a different story. Or we can go through something in our life, even, like.
Um, I was thinking recently about difficulties of, like, change in career or, like, uncertainty. And I’ve just noticed myself, I was like, “Oh, I could tell this story about what’s happening, or I could tell this story about what’s happening. If I tell this story about what’s happening, I feel pretty good, and there’s no reason why that wouldn’t be true.
So why am I … ” Mm. S- why … And I think I … There’s just so much power. Even I think about, like, love, like coming, bringing that one in ’cause we spoke about it just briefly. Mm.

Creating a Love Story Instead of Winning Arguments

How can relationship stories strengthen connection with your partner?

I feel like one of the things that’s made … I recently got engaged, and one of the thing that’s been really beautiful for our relationship, and I think we can credit actually a lot of the strength that our relationship has, is the story.
It’s a beautiful love story. And- All of our community have reinforced this story to us, and they have, they, and they tell us, and they use their words, and they say, “You guys, like, you show us, and you, you are, like, the, like, the goals for us.” And, and they, they just te- they just, like, place upon us their words.
And it, it helps us when we’re having our dysregulated moments, I think, because that’s our story. Mm. And that’s what we remember. And so we’re like, “No, we’re, we are Sheridan and Canal. Why- we would never speak to each other like that, ’cause we are Sheridan and Canal.” Does, does that make sense? I am misty-eyed, goosebumpy, like, oh, I love this so much.
And I feel like, yeah, I’m in a very similar situation with everything being re- you know, my family reinforcing things, my friends reinforcing. I’m in a very, very similar situation. And it absolutely… I just feel like, yeah, the story can absolutely transcend the mundanity of situations- Mm … and, and give us, you know, that.
And I think this is what religion does for people, and spirituality can do for people. But if we’re, if we’re even extracting those down to their essence, they’re really just stories. And to be able to have those stories that you can hold on tightly to and be like, “This is, this is what our story is, and this is how our archetypes behave within that story,” um, yeah, I adore that.
I adore that for you, and I’m just so happy for you. And I just, oh, I can feel the love, and I’m so, so honored to be in the midst of such, such reverence.
Can you give me… Thank you. And can you give me an example of, like, those, those archetypes? I’m curious. I, I agree, and I’m intrigued by the use of the word archetype.
Like, what are you thinking? Well, it’s, you’re in a love story, and you would be the lovers- Mm … behaving within that story. Mm. You’re not going to be, you know, the- Mm … you’re not going to come out and be the, the jester and just start, you know- Yeah … you know- Yeah … y- those things where you say, “Oh, he was joking all the time, but it was really mean,” or things like that.
It’s like, no, you are, you are in a love story, and you are behaving as lovers, and this is how you treat each other, and this is the unwritten rules of your relationship, is we are the lovers, and we treat each other with reverence. And, and you are my beloved and my soulmate and my twin fla- whatever it may be that that- story encapsulates for you. But that almost creates the capsule of how you engage with each other. Yeah. Yep, yep, yeah, yep, yep.

Perimenopause Archetypes and Rediscovering Intuition

What archetypes emerge during perimenopause?

So then how do you think… Like, what are the unwritten stories that most people are carrying, let’s just say around perimenopause? What are the archetypes that are playing out there?
Oh, I’ve got, I’ve got my archetypes that are playing out. Um, but I think To be honest, I think there’s a lot of really unconscious behaviours going on for most of society. I think once you get to the point of an archetype, you kind of have a feel of what’s going on for you. Like, you kind of- Mm … have a sense of there’s not as much fragmentation.
And I think a lot of what society, um, does these days, and probably for a very long time just through, you know, social media or media in general and the stories we’re being told, it- most of that fragments us. Like, “You’re meant to be doing this. You’re meant to go to, you know, do school-” Mm … uni, get the job, get the husband, get the c- yeah, the house, the kids,” all of that.
And I think it really fragments us away from our own sense of intuition and instinct. The… I find that in perimenopause, the archetypes that became, become really evident are based on having a greater sense of self-awareness and, and it’s through that, like, the transition of perimenopause. You know, when y- when your estrogen starts to wane and all fucks are abandoning us, and it’s like, “Okay, well, I can start living for me now, and I can start making choices based on what I truly want and not carrying everything for everyone else.”
And then things like the mystic might appear, where it’s like, “Oh, I really wanna start, you know, getting more into a conscious relationship with Earth or the seasons or, you know, u- uh, astrology or things like that.” Like, that’s probably one of the f- the first ones you start seeing is women having an interest in their own intuition and tapping back into their own intuition, which I think is such I think that’s where women’s power lies, and I think society tries a lot to sway us from that.
Yeah. Absolutely, I would agree with that statement. It’s almost like I don’t… What I kind of hear as well is that, and I, this might be true for most hormonal changes or anything in life or imbalances, including something like endometriosis or something, in anything in life that forces or causes us to have not really much of a choice but to get back in contact with our body.
I feel like probably what happens in those moments is, like, you either just, like, accept it and surrender and you’re like, “Okay, cool. We have to, like, figure- we’ve gotta figure out what’s going on in this body. We have to get back into it. I have to address these things.” Um, or you go completely the other way and you try to avert over it, and that is a y- but you become, you become a little bit radicalized.
And it’s been my observation and personal experience that that almost solidifies your inner archetype a little bit more. So, like, maybe the mystic would come out, and there’s this, like, deep intuition. Or maybe for somebody else, um, it makes you… I’m thi- I’m getting, like, a Kali type, you know, like, this righteous, you know that righteous leadership?
Like, it’s a very healthy righteousness. It’s like, “No, no, no, no. Like, that is not okay, and I have no fucks to give, and we’re fixing that problem because that is not okay in the world.” Or, like, that, that. And but those are genuinely deep and true to those individuals, but we only were able to get there when we sifted away all of the other, like, noise, I think, that stops us from being in deep contact with that little gem inside of us.
Mm. I love that you bring up Kali because I think she’s such It’s probably, she’s probably the, you know, role model of true femininity in balance. You know, that creator-destructor that- Mm … w- you know, we can’t have creation without destruction, and that’s probably the thing that, um, you know, if we’re… I don’t like blaming the patriarchy for everything.
Yeah. But, you know, and, and I love men, and there’s, it’s not a man problem, it’s just, you know, whenever any organizations are very vulnerable to corruption on any level. So that, um, I do feel like Kali is something that women across the board should really sh- should really experience and should really delve into a little bit more to understand we- it is okay to rage.
It is. It is part of our nature, is to rage. You know, the mama bear is terrifying. Um, and I, and I, yeah, I absolutely love that you bring her up because I feel like, oh, so much of my experience has come from allowing myself to feel things that weren’t feminine. And I, and I absolutely, to, to loop back to what you were saying about disease, dis-ease and, you know, women’s conditions, I’ve had it all.
Like endo, infertility, hyperfertility, miscarriage, breast can- you know, I’ve had all of them, and every single one is like, “Come back further into your feminine. We’re not just gonna neurofen our way through this and go to work 9:00 to 5:00.” You know, come back into the feminine. Deepen, deepen, deepen. Soften, soften, soften.
Rage where you need to rage. Create boundaries where you need to create boundaries. Um, but every single one of them is an init- an initiation, absolutely. Mm.

Grace, Motherhood and Working a 9-to-5

How do you cope with work, parenting and constant overwhelm?

So what’s your advice then when people… Like, I have my own, but I’m curious yours, when people just, like, really genuinely have to navigate, let’s just say a 9 to 5 or, uh, let’s say caring commitments or something, when there are these external things that are- required of them that are really hard on their bodies.
What do you recommend? What do you say? I think, firstly grace with yourself. I think a lot of women aren’t carrying the stress of it at work, I think they carry it home with them, and then they beat themselves up ’cause it’s like, “I can’t be, I’m not the best mom,” or, “I’m not, you know, able to do all of these things.”
And I think being able to have grace- Hmm … across the board is super important. Like, that’s probably the biggest thing I find is women, y- we mask. We can mask so well in the 9:00 to 5:00, and that’s mostly where it doesn’t show up. It shows up outside of that when we can drop the mask, and it’s like, “Why am I so angry with my partner?”
Or, “Why am I s- shouting at the kids?” Or, “Why can’t I, you know, volunteer for this thing like other moms can?” Or, and it, I think grace is really important in those moments, just to be able to say, “You know what? I’m, under these circumstances, I’m doing really well. You know, I’m still there for my kids. I’m not the shiniest person ever, but, um, it’s understandable that we can’t hold it all.”
And being able to, yeah, to extend grace to ourselves is probably the greatest gift we could give ourselves and those around us. If we can model grace to our children- Hmm … and to our community, I think that’s probably going to mean more than any, you know, therapeutic intervention probably could. Yeah. And thinking about the story in that, there’s, I think the story that’s happening in there is, like, I should volunteer for these things.
I should be this type of, this specific version of present for my kid after work, or this, I should do this. And I just wonder, like, if I was to use my own trick that I used my s- myself this morning, maybe next time I’m in a situation like that where I feel like I’ve gotta, for me, it feels like a pushing through.
Like, “Oh, yeah, everything’s fine, of course.” Um, you know. I think the story that, the question that I would ask myself is, like, how would I feel about this, or how would I behave if I knew that me having this physical experience was, like, also perfect? Or how would I- move about this. I, I, I didn’t say this one initially because I don’t like this question and I found it really hard to answer.

What Happens When You Truly Believe You Are Enough?

How would your life change if you knew you were already enough?

It’s really used, but I think that I’ve come to a point where I understand it a little bit differently. So if it resonates for you, take it. If it doesn’t, just move it away. Which is how would I relate to this if I actually knew that I was enough? If I knew that I was- Oh … totally enough, and I was also tired, and I didn’t have to prove that I’m hardworking or present or a good mom or a good partner, I just, I’m enough and I’m tired.
How would I make dinner? God, Sheridan Oh, that just hit me so deep in my heart. Mm. I, and I, you know, single mum most of the time, primary care of my kids. So for me, I’ve really had to come to a place of being like I, I can’t do everything, and I’m actually starting to feel like 50% is enough. Mm. And it’s such a glorious place to land.
But again, I think, and, and I haven’t really thought about Carly in such a long time, so I love that you brought her up because it’s such a, she’s such a dominant archetype. When we’re traversing these experiences that require us to be able to be a feminine version that’s not just soft and demure and catering to everyone else, and I feel like being able to be, you know, angry sometimes or upset sometimes or, you know, be able to sit in the experience of not being perfect.
I think she’s a really great role model for that as well. But gosh, am I… Yeah, how would… Woof, I can’t even remember the question, but just the way you said enough got me. Yeah. Yeah. I just wrote it down for myself as well to, like, remember for the rest of the day. It, it, I don’t know if it’s- It’s like this, I have a, I have a friend of mine who’s, like, kind of deciding something that she has to do with her business, and she’s really afraid of, like, her reputation if she fails, like what will people think of her, you know, of her career.
And I keep coming back to that question as well of, like, fear of failure is one thing. But fear of losing reputation or not being enough if you fail, like, ’cause sometimes it’s like we’re not afraid of failing, we’re afraid of what that would mean about us. Mm. You know, the failure, you figure it out, you just get through it, you find another way to make money.
I don’t know, but, like, but it’s like what does this mean? And it comes back to this idea of, like, self-concept, which is also, we were speaking about this before, of like how could I have, um… The way that I treat myself is based off of how I understand myself to be, what I think that I’m worth. The way that I allow other people to treat me is, like, how what I think that I’m worth- Mm
being treated. So it’s like, do I, if I fully believe that my self-concept, my self-concept is I’m a frigging amazing mom, I’m gonna feel really differently about the fact that I’m also tired today. Mm. Yeah It’s, it’s a, it’s a tough… Oh, and I think it’s so contextual.
Um, I feel like some of those m- hardest experiences really gave me a permission slip in ways that I wouldn’t have.
Like, cancer for me gave me a permission slip not to have to stress and dive into drama all the time. Mm-hmm. Mm. And being a single mother has given me a permission slip to be, to be like, “Hey, guys, I’m, I’m going for a med- mommy’s going for a meditation.” And, like, I don’t have to be- Mm … there all the time, and, you know, the things that I thought would make me a good parent when I was in a relationship have changed so much now that I’m a single mom.
And I, and I feel like that story has really- Um, f- for a long time that’s, the thought of single motherhood terrified me, and now I just see it. I think there’s just so many women that are rocking it now that I’m like, “Oh, wow, okay. I could be a single mom, and I can take care of myself, and I can advocate for myself, and I can have all these boundaries that I didn’t really believe in before.”
That I thought I was a martyr very much so. Hmm. So is a lot of it also just having more role models and believe- is it also just the story and believing that it’s possible? I think, and I think what you were saying about your community around you, saying that, you know, you are, you, how they reflect- Mm
your story back to you. Yeah. And I think that’s so important, what stories are being reflected back. You know, what stories are, do, what stories can we see and what are being positively affirmed to us? Yeah.

Redefining Success Beyond Hustle Culture

Why are boundaries still undervalued in business and leadership? Yeah. I was at a gala last night for entrepreneurs in Australia. It was this black tie event, and you can only go if you make a certain amount of money, like over a million dollars a year or something like that.
And I was in- invited I don’t make over a million dollars a year, but I was invited to go as a guest for, because I’ve been doing some work to support them. And as all of these, I noticed in the- In the speeches when they were giving out the awards and congratulating them, a lot of the people that were winning were being af- ref- affirmed that they’re getting this award because they respond to something at 10:00 PM.
They respond to a message at 10:00 PM. They’re always available. They, they drive three hours to go to events. Like, they’re attending lots of events. They’re doing a lot of things, and I really… I, m- I’m not coming with an answer. I’m coming with a question, bringing us all a question, because I have been doing nervous system regulation for burnout for over, for like 10 years now.
Um, and I still sit with this question, which is these incredible leaders who I would love to be Are receiving awards because they are constantly available and do a lot of things, and I struggle with it. ‘Cause there was not a single person up there who was verbally congratulated for their boundaries- Mm.
or for doing less, but being present when they are. They might, it might be affirmed back to them in some ways, but I, I had a moment where I just, I struggled. ‘Cause I was like, you know, as much as we can sit and we can do this work, and I’m s- I will sit with someone, and I sit hours every, every single week, and sit with individuals, and we sit and we, in front of this, and we sit and we say, “We are enough when we do less.”
And we affirm, and we feel it back into our body, and we find the evidence in our life. And we have to do that so actively because in the awards ceremony, for as much as we have said goodbye to hustle culture, and we can now work from home, the thing that people are congratulating is how often you are present, how much time you spend, and h- how many things you attend.
And I had this funny reaction of like, one, I’m really frigging happy that I can help people counterbalance this. Two, I’m really, I felt really secure about my job. I was like, “We’re always gonna need people like me to help people.” ‘Cause this is a thing. And the third one was, like, I just felt maybe a little bit frustrated and worried.
Like, really? There’s… I don’t know. I felt, I felt all those things. What do, what do you feel when I tell you that? First, I’ve, it brings me back. So we’re, come from the same circles. Like five years ago, I think it was very, I, and you know, I wasn’t- I was quite happy being like a stay at home mom and having my s- you know, my passion projects on the side and things like that.
But also it was very, very present in feminine business. Um, you know, if you’re not earning six figures, you’ve got money blocks, or if you’re not doing it- Mm … this way. And it was, it was that bro style of marketing was very much crossed over into the feminine style of b- into feminine business as well. And I’m so grateful to have women around me now that are luxuriating in the richness of life without having any of those external validators, you know, dangling carrots.
It’s like- Mm-hmm … the amount of women that I’m now seeing that have been through all of that with, been through the hustle culture, been through like, um… I just, I’m loving it. I’m loving that it is becoming more present now that I’ve got- Mm … women, like I, you know, I have so many women in my field now that are like, “Oh, I’m doing so much less, and it feels so good, and I can actually be present with my family.
I can be present with my kids. My relationships are thriving.” You know, I don’t need… Like, it’s stressful having to keep up appearances. It’s stressful having to- Mm … um, hit goals every month and- Yes, I think it is, I think it is still there, and I think it, it’s kind of underpinned a lot of business since business probably first began, was like the metrics of it is what makes it business versus a luscious little hobby.
Mm. But I also feel like I can feel it shifting. And I, and I … Yeah, I, I can feel it shifting, and I can feel people … Like I was, I would look up to some of those women that were like, “Oh, you know, I just had a seven-figure launch.” And I’d be like, “Okay, well, that’s what I need to be doing to be successful.” And- Mm.
I feel the shift within me. I can see the shift in other women around me where it’s like, “No. No thank you. I just want a really beautiful, meaningful, purposeful life where I can actually be present and, and enjoy it.” Yeah. And it, ’cause it comes back to that feeling of enough, you know. And also, like maybe creating rituals and ins- maybe what I’m desiring underneath that is like a ritual and, and some sort of institution where we actually sit with our f- with our circle and our people, and we say, “I’m gonna give you an award for only doing things when you have energy.
I’m gonna give you an award for not being on your phone when you’re with me. I’m gonna give you … ” It’s like this, this flipping, ’cause there’s so much space for like the impact and the ambitious. I love that. I am like my mid-heaven Aries and Mars, and like I’m so … I, I will do everything, and I love it, and I also want to affirm and have everyone else affirm that like enough is also enough.
Like enough is enough.

Living from Inspiration Instead of Desperation

What does it feel like to create from inspiration rather than burnout?

It’s- Yeah, I definitely have, I’ve noticed a, a same shift as you of people just being like, “Ooh, actually, like, I could just…” Somebody asked me the other day, they’re like, “What are you doing for marketing?” I was like, “I actually just have s- just chosen not to market anymore.” I’m so bad at it now.
I’m like, I just don’t. If I really like something, I’ll do it. Like, I love this. I love doing podcasts. Yeah. It’s my favorite. I’m just like, this is my vibe. But I’m really… I’m, like, writing my emails, and I’m like, I should probably put some sort of sales pitch in there. I’m like, oh, it’s art. I’ll just enjoy it, you know?
And it, uh, yeah, I could be- Yeah … doing more, but I- I’m really happy with the way I’m doing things. And I think, you know, that’s the, that’s the award is, like- Yeah … you know, it feels good in my body. Feels really good. Yeah. The feedback I’m getting is I feel good. Like, I’m not, like… Yeah, I’m, I’m just not pushing through in the times when I don’t feel like I have to anymore. And, and you feel it on the other side. It’s like, oh, I have inspiration now. It’s not like a desperation anymore. It’s inspiration, and it feels so juicy. Yeah. Yeah, I love that feeling when you’re, like, in the stillness and you haven’t done anything for a while, and you just have that little spark come up, and you’re like, oh, I wanna- Do something.
Oh, that’s such a great place to be. Yeah, and you would feel that with that Aries mid-heaven. Absolutely. As a Pisces with a Mer- Aries mid-heaven, I can imagine. Yeah. There’s a lot of oscillation in my experience- … a lot of both/and. Yeah. Well, you’d have access to it all through Pisces, and then y- that mid-heaven Aries, you’d be like, “Let’s, let’s make something of it.”
That’s great. Yes. And then I have the Taurus moon that’s like, “I’m just gonna stay at home and make some bone broth, actually.” Yeah. That is such a gorgeous moon. What are you? What is yours? Uh, so Sag rising, Scorpio, 12th house Scorpio. Mm. And then, uh, Virgo moon, which I’ve… But my Virgo moon- Oh … is very much like, “I just wanna help people and make, you know, everything nice and pristine for people.”
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yours is so contrasted, actually, to mine. Yeah. Well, got, both got the earth moons. I love an earth moon. Yeah. There’s something so juicy about an earth moon. For me, it just feels so natural, and probably ’cause that’s what I have. But- Yes. Yeah … I, I do love it. I do love it. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, well, thank you so much for sitting with me today, Sheridan.
This has been such a blast. Like, I’m so… It feels like s- lifetimes since I’ve seen you. I’ve changed so much, and you’ve got your book out now, which I am so thrilled for you. Bestselling book. It is just such a joy to watch you on your journey, and how you do, you know, work from such a place of regulation and, and being able to- And I, and your book definitely speaks to this as well, being able to make the right choices when you are settled.
Mm. And, um, it’s just such, such a joy to watch you and to be in your midst and to sit with you. Yeah. Where can our beautiful listeners follow you and join in on your world? I know you say you’re not marketing anymore, but there has to be somewhere. Yes, yes. There has to be somewhere we can find you. Um, you can go to sheridanruth.com/book, and you can actually download the first chapter for free.
And then if you’re into the first chapter, you can go on Amazon and grab the book. Um, I think it’s $10 to $30, depending if you want the hard copy. Um, and then my website has everything that I’m up to at the moment. We have a course. Uh, you might find me on LinkedIn sometimes. Uh, but most of the time I usually just send an email when I’ve got that little spark.
So the best way to keep in contact with me is to sign up for emails through getting the free chapter of the book. Um, if you are new to nervous system regulation, or you’re just trying to be more practical about it like we spoke about it today, um, if you go to sheridanruth.com/regulate, you’ll find this incredible PDF that is just… I, I was- I’ve created it once, and I’ve just been completely astounded by how helpful it’s been to other people. It’s been downloaded hundreds of times. Um, it’s just ways to regulate without much time, privacy, or space, uh, built through polyvagal theory, and it’s just really a good thing to pop on your phone so that when you have your moments, you can just be like, “Just get out the thing.”
Um, and they’re really kind of outside-the-box solutions. So yeah. Um, thanks for joining us and listening. Now this is … I, I’m really happy. It feels like we spoke yesterday, but you’re right. It’s actually been… Wow, things have changed. Yes, so much. I’m so proud of us. I’m so proud of us. I just feel like, yeah, we’re both in such a different situation now.
Yeah. I’m so… Gosh, it just brings me so much joy to see you happy in relationship, and oh. You too. Oh. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. You’re, you are glowing. Thank you for organizing this. You are so beautiful. I’m really, really happy. I would love to have you back on sometime. Yes. And in the meantime, um, you have… Enjoy your love bubble, and we will catch you on the other side.
Thank you so much, Sheridan. Bye-bye.
Thank you for sitting with us today. It has been an absolute joy. If you’d like to work with me or connect with any one of our beautiful guests, you can find everything at perimoon.com.au. And until next time, may you find yourself all the way alive.